Final Wish
by blackrose1m
Summary: Weeks have passed since the events of ch125, and they've become to take their toll on each of the men tied together by blood. They're hopeless, and yet, they wouldn't have it any other way. Spoilers for aforementioned chapter. KuroFai


**A/N: **_Hello I hope you enjoy this piece--I wrote it because I became so tired of the post-125 sex!fics that seemed to be everywhere on LiveJournal and wanted something different. The relationship between these two is so much different from many others in anime and manga--it focuses more on the dialogue between the two characters rather than physical intimacy, which is what I love so much about it._

_This fic is showing more the change that Fai's vampirism has brought to their relationship, both physically and emotionally, rather than using feeding as an excuse for intercourse._

It was strange, seeing the wizard squatting down and smiling at the kids, one of his eyes hidden behind a large, black patch. The girl didn't know there was only a socket behind it. She also didn't know why Fai was always so pale, or why his eye always looked so sunken.

Kurogane knew.

"Wizard," he said, unfolding his arms and getting to his feet. Fai glanced up at the ninja, his cheerful expression faltering for just a moment, before turning his smiling face back to the kids and leaping to his feet. He threw his hands in the air and slipped an arm around Kurogane's shoulder, pulling the irritable man down slightly, and pointing the other finger in the air in a very matter-of-fact way.

"Now children, Father and Mother have some important matters to discuss," he said, winking and waggling his finger. "Mokona, keep an eye on them for me?"

The manjuu didn't respond.

Kurogane turned and left their safehouse, hearing the soft patter of feet on the street behind him and knowing that Fai was there. It wasn't hot, but very humid--the Ninja's button-up shirt clung to him, damp with sweat and rain and God only knew what else.

The wizard trotted up beside Kurogane and matched his quick, long strides--his fine blonde hair clung to the back of his neck and his face glistened with sweat, despite the fact that he had spent almost the entire day inside. He began to tremble and fidgeted nervously with his hands, keeping that eerie smile on his sickly white features.

"You can stop pretending," the Ninja said, looking straight ahead. "It's irritating."

"Hmm?" Fai said, glancing over at the taller man with his lazy, catlike grin still plastered on his face. His hands wouldn't stop shaking. "What do you mean, Kuro-pon?"

"You know damn well what I mean," he growled under his breath, and the other man frowned, deep lines forming on his forehead and around his mouth. Kurogane glanced away from the blonde, his eyes landing on a suitable spot for them to perform the necessery ritual. An alley--small, but with enough room for the two, and in a part of town that seemed to be deserted. He nodded in its direction and grunted a quick "Here" while shifting his direction--he stopped when the blonde's footsteps ceased and glanced over his shoulder, raising a questioning eyebrow.

"Did you... Did you remember to eat?" Fai asked, and Kurogane knew he was only buying time. Still, the ninja humored him with an affirmative grunt and continued to approach the alley, leaning back against the cool brick wall and waiting for the wizard to come. It had been weeks since the deal was made with the time-witch and Kurogane could count on both hands how many times the blonde had fed off of him--none of those times were ever voluntary. He could always tell when it was time--Fai would sleep almost all the time, his skin would turn an alarming shade of white, and he would fidget constantly.

The shock of Fai's long, bony fingers ghosting along the side of his neck pulled Kurogane out of his thoughts--he fought back a shudder as they rested just below his ear, the icy fingers tangling themselves in his short, coase hair. He instead slumped against the wall, lowering himself a bit to make it easier for the wizard, and Fai leaned in, the other sweaty palm touching his collarbone and the freezing fingers working their way under his unbuttoned shirt, pulling the damp cotton away to expose the skin beneath.

Kurogane tried to relax, knowing it wouldn't help either of them if he was tense. He tipped his head slightly, leaning into the hand cupped around his cheek, exposing the tender area of flesh on his neck--the bites always healed quickly, but never completely, it seemed.

But instead of the sting of his teeth and the tingling of the blood leaving the wound, Kurogane felt a rush of hot air as the blond sighed and rested his warm, sweat-covered forehead on the ninja's chest. He felt Fai's icy fingers move out from under the collar of his shirt and move down towards his own face, in hopes that they might cool him down.

"You're... sick?" Kurogane heard himself say, though it didn't sound like him. The harshness that was usually present in his voice was gone, and he was left with only poorly-masked concern. The magician looked up, his face weary and much older-looking. He smiled ruefully and said, "So you didn't notice? How unlike you, Kuro-tan"

The taller man grunted irritably, furrowing his brow at Fai--he didn't want to tell him about the things on his mind that had kept him from noticing. Although, from the almost sly look on his face, Fai looked as though he didn't need to ask. Kurogane hated it when he didn't need to ask.

"I'm not that easy to read," the ninja said, scowling at the opposite wall. His shoulders tightened when he felt teeth lightly grazing on his collarbone, searching for the tender spot where the flesh never seemed to heal.

"No." Fai's chapped lips moved slowly across his skin, his warm breath a stark contrast to the cold fingers that had wandered back under the collar of his shirt. "We're just the same, that's all." Kurogane felt his eyes narrow suspiciously and he took the shorter man's chin in his fingers, tilting it up so he could look him in the eye.

"How so?" he growled, and he felt the wizard shift his weight, leaning more of it on Kurogane--not to provoke him, but because it was getting harder for him to support himself. He'd need to eat soon.

Fai's eyes flashed for just a moment before he smiled gently and murmured, "We're both murderers, aren't we?"

"Murderers...?" the ninja echoed, the word escaping his lips before he even knew he'd said it. The clammy hand on his cheek traced back down along his neck, then pressed itself against the wall next to Kurogane. Fai pushed himself off of the ninja just a little, trying desperately to keep himself uprighted--his eyes were clouded and unfocused, his fair cheeks flushed from fever.

"If I wasn't before, I am now," he said, as though he were talking about the weather. "Isn't that right?"

Kurogane's eyes flashed angrily and he balled his hands into fists, fully prepared to strike, but unable to. His shaking hands remained at his sides and the taller man pushed himself off the wall, stepping back out into the dimly-lit street.

"We're going back," he muttered, struggling to keep his voice relatively calm. A strange, familiar pain creeped across his chest. "You're delusional. We'll do this when they're sleeping."

"Kuro-mii--"

"Shut up," he growled, cutting off the wizard. The pain lingered, and he balled his fists tighter, feeling his nails dig into the skin of his palm. He closed his eyes and ground his teeth angrily--he recognized this feeling. It was the same sort of pain he'd felt when he saw his mother die, or his father's arm in the teeth of that dragon. The same as when he'd first met the Princess Tomoyo in another world and she hadn't recognized him...

"I'm right, aren't I, Kuro-pon?"

...The same pain he'd felt when he saw this person on his deathbed.

"_I said shut up!_ "

A long silence passed between the two of them--Kurogane's ragged breaths were the only thing that stood out from the occasional whisper of the breeze. It seemed as though an eternity had passed before Fai broke the silence.

"Did you really think this would help...?" His voice was suddenly low, harsh. Kurogane blinked in surprise, turning to make certain they were alone, and saw only the magician leaning against the wall--his face was dark, his only visible eye sunken and underlined with dark rings. "You said if I wanted to die that badly that you would kill me," he continued quietly, taking a few steps forward. "But so far the only person you're killing is yourself."

...So he knew.

Kurogane had tried his best to hide his weakness after each feeding--the dizziness, the nausea... Usually, he would retreat straight to his room after each time, exclaiming as brashly as he could that he was tired, and the pork bun better not wake him. Once he was behind closed doors, he would slide into a corner, trying to keep the room from spinning, shaking just as badly as the magician was now. Of course, once he'd slipped up and hadn't eaten--he'd almost passed out then. Fai had stayed with him all night.

He was approaching Kurogane now, step by shaky step, his ice-blue eyes never leaving the ninja's gaze. "I told you before that I didn't want anyone to get hurt because of me. I _wanted_ to die." He stopped, a mere step away from the taller man, and his face softened. "But you knew that," the light breathiness returned to his voice, but the smile did not return to his face. "Didn't you, Kurogane."

He could only stare at Fai, watching him as he struggled to stand straight and keep his breathing steady. He could only watch as they faded away into nothing, gradually weakening until there was nothing left of _either _of them. Kurogane knew one day he'd look just as weak as the man before him did--he knew it wouldn't be long before he wouldn't be able to fight at all, and yet, he didn't care.

He knew he'd thrown away everything the minute the knife had touched his skin. There was no turning back, and nothing left for him in either direction. He didn't know why he'd acted the way he did--screamed, swore, put his fists through walls--all for this magician... but he knew that if he hadn't done anything, this aching...

"Why?"

Fai's soft voice pulled him out of his thoughts, and he found himself reaching out and gripping firmly onto the other man to steady him--the other hand touched the wizard's face, running his fingers through the blond hair and cradling his head the same way he'd done all those weeks ago. Pride wouldn't let him say how much this man confused and intrigued him--he couldn't tell him about the ache he felt when he thought of what could've happened that night, had he not done what he did.

It wasn't love--he didn't know what that was. He was too much of a sinner to be granted that sort of happiness.

"I don't know," he said quietly, his brow furrowed, his mouth frowning.

But as he gazed upon the dying vampire that stood before him, kept alive by himself and _only_ himself, he knew that he wanted the wizard to be alive for _just_ a little longer, even at the cost of his own strength, his own life. It was selfish of him to ask for anything, or to keep the blond alive, but he didn't care. Dying with him would be his final wish. While his hands were stained with so much blood, he was thankful, truly thankful, that he should be granted it.

Fai only watched him in silence, then smiled weakly, taking the hand that cradled his head and running the backs of the ninja's fingers along his lips. He didn't need to ask.

"Hyuu Kuro-pon," he sighed, closing his eyes as he savored the feeling of Kurogane's cool fingers against his cheek. "We're hopeless."


End file.
